Asking for Prayers While We Stay Watchful

I did not want to post anything regarding this until we knew more for sure. You have shown us how much you love and care for my family and we feel so blessed by that. I never want to take you along on a roller-coaster ride of emotions unless there's a good reason for it. It didn't seem purposeful to insert drama without knowing for sure. But after many have read Mike's facebook status requesting prayer for Cayman, I thought it was only right for me to fill you in. Like I said, not for the purpose to string you along on an elevation of emotions while we stand by on high alert for signs of a shunt malfunction but I do not want you to feel left in the dark of the happenings in our lives either and think it does not matter to us how much you care for our family. We deeply feel great appreciation for our readers and the earnest prayers you have said for us.

Last night was scary! Cayman was just not her self. She went to bed a little early than her usual time.

At around 11 p.m. we heard noises coming from her room. We checked on her. It's a habit for me to examine the appearance of her shunt. Not wanting to awaken her, I left her room light off and very gently touched over top of her shunt to feel with my fingertips if there were any changes. The puffy, squish underneath my touch alarmed me and I flipped the light switch on and in an instant peered over her crib. She was still pink, breathing, and asleep.

Her shunt definitely looked different. It was a large sack of fluid ballooning from underneath of her skin.

Mike reached for his phone and dialed the on-call Neurosurgeon. I grabbed bags and discovered I can pack stuff for three people pretty rapidly.

In between all that, I lifted Cayman out of her bed trying to wake her so we could get an idea of her state of alertness.

She kept us guessing though. At times she seemed perfectly okay, laughing and clapping her hands. Then at other times she would pull at her ears, lay her head down, and stare off into space. Then she'd return to sitting up and laughing again. And then soon back to crying while grabbing at her shunt.

Oh how she keeps us on our toes.

Since the signs were not completely clear, we decided to take the 'wait and see' approach.

At about midnight Mike finally went to bed so he could get as much rest as possible before work in the morning. I stayed up with Cayman, rocking her back to sleep, and being watchful over her.

We kept our bags packed and the doctor's number close by.

All it would have taken was for her to throw up once and we would have been out the door and on our way to the hospital.

Very likely, all this extra fluid accumulating around her shunt could be normal and will resolve itself. But for the fact that it has suddenly appeared at the same time Cayman is not quite herself has put us in a high alert status to watch her closely.

I feel so exhausted and terribly frightened. I never want to have to know the strength it takes to bury my child. I feel burdened that I have that on my mind right now.

I keep reminding myself that God is with us. He has not changed.

In the mean time, could you pray for us and our sweet little girl, that all of this can just turn out to be no more than signs of over reacting parents.

I am crying because I know you will and I feel a deep appreciation to you all!

Love,

Kristen